So, it finally came to this, Dark Horse.. I knew that it would, but I didn’t think that it would come so soon… you have thrown me into the realm of Conan, the Barbarian. I have managed to avoid anything “Conan” related since California elected him as governor, but it seems that he’s a captain of a pirate ship, here, so I guess he can do just about anything, huh?

I don’t know.. I venture away from capes and tights to do my work here, and that usually lands me in the genres of horror, sci-fi and fantasy, so my boss gave me two of the new Conan series. This series is called “Road of Kings” and is so named because he is trying to get his girlfriend, Olivia, who was sold into slavery by her father, back home to the kingdom of Ophir, where she is a princess.

We begin with Conan as a pirate, captain of a vessel, devoted boyfriend of Olivia and murderous slayer of enemies. He loses his ship and the only people he has with him, are Olivia and one of those he commanded, Krimsar. Krimsar is a true to heart pirate and theif and manages to convince Conan to accompany him to “Shadizar, the Wicked”, place burgeoning with theives and scoundrels.. I like to think of Mos Eisley. Conan agrees to get some travel cash, so he can take his lady, Olivia back to her father (who sold her into slavery!) because she is having countless nightmares of his calling her home and apologizing for sending her away, in the first place.

I think the cover, that was drawn by Doug Wheatley was VERY..well, romance novel. It definitely showed the love Conan has for Olivia and how willing he is to protect her. I just suppose that well, I don’t care about her all too much. I am not reading a Conan comic to think about love. I want to read about violence and anger and throats being slashed. I mean, isn’t that the point? Why do I care about a barbarian’s softer side? I’ll admit it, I’m interested in the private life and thoughts of Darth Vader because I know that he started out as a youngling who was gifted with lots of midichlorians. If I want to know about Conan, I want to know about him and not his girlfriend or the pirate/thief he is assisting.

This series is written by Roy Thomas and drawn by Mike Hawthorne. I have to say that I am a little disappointed that Thomas has written Conan as more of a supporting character than as a main draw. This is true, at least for the first two comics in the series. If they continue in such a manner, they won’t really do the series justice because Conan isn’t the star of the show and the other two characters aren’t strong enough to carry the books.

The artwork is looks very polished, glossy. The characters look pretty good for pirates, the booty must be enough to cover dental, because there are terrific teeth in every mouth. Conan and Olivia look beautiful, and the other characters don’t. I mean, they look pretty good for pirates, though. I guess I have to get over my trip on traditional comic style. My friends who make comics tease me about the fact that I prefer traditional “capes and tights” but here I am, writing almost exclusively about other types of comics. I suppose it’s not that I don’t like them, but they are not enough of an escape..

This series is decent. I am not basing it on ANYTHING that has to do with the Conan movies or any other series in the Conan universe, because I don’t really know anything about Conan. Maybe someone can send a comment and school me on it. But you know, don’t expect to convert me. There was a lot of bloodshed between the two books and anyone can appreciate that. I really enjoyed the Frank Miller-esque blood splatterings. The books are a quick read, and I read each of them twice, to be able to make sure I knew what I was going to say… or that I could at least make some sense. So, if you are a Conan follower then get into it.